How Abuse Affects A Child, Part 1

By Danni Moss
Copyright protected, all rights reserved

My oldest son (J) is in college; attending the same school I am.  I help him and other students with their papers – editing but never writing, of course!  Last semester he made a statement in a paper that struck me.  I knew it was true but it was interesting to me that he realized and expressed it.  Here’s what he said (copied with his permission):

It seemed to me that I had to live my life to everyone else’s expectations and follow their dreams for me. I was raised going to church every Sunday, hating every visit, tortured by every sermon. Looking around, I had no doubt there was a God but I did not want more [rules]. I already had one father who seemed great in public then at home would verbally and physically attack me. I did not feel I needed another father like that so I rejected a heavenly father.

Fortunately, when he was 18, J did accept Christ and his life changed dramatically and visibly. My point is that his “wonderful Christian” father’s private abuse, which the church refused to acknowledge, nearly cost this boy his relationship with God. That is probably the single biggest reason it matters that the church get its collective head out of the sand and take responsibility for abuse in the homes of church families. There is a Biblical pattern to address church discipline – it needs to be Biblically exercised.

2 Responses

  1. Suffer not the little children, bring them to Jesus. MARK 10:14. The Word of God is medicine for the hurting heart. Praise Jesus for the above testimony a student wrote, regarding “How abuse affects a child, part 1”. Children shold never witness domestic violence, especially not in a home where both parents a professing believers. The negetive affects of emotionally abuse and all other forms of abuse are devastating to the developing mind of babies, even from the womb through birth, young childhood and teens. Parents must repent! Fair too many professing Christians are secretly bound behind closed doors, in the inquity of verbal, mental, physical, sexual and/or spiritual abuse. God hates domestic violence. Psalm 11:5. Jesus came to set the captives free. Luke 4. God hates it when one covers their spouse and off springs with the garment of violence, whether verbal, mental cruelity, abandonment, etc. Malachi Chapter 2. Jesus cares. 1 Peter 5:7.
    All forms of domestic violence causes the mind, will and emotions to perish, and devours the physical body, the immune system, and causes many other deseases. God so loved the world, that He sent Jesus, so that when we believe in Him, we shall have life and NOT PERISH. John 3:16. Not perish in eternal hell, nor torment and turture of domestic violence–secretly and slowly dying behind closed door. All attributes of abuse is an abomination to God per Proverbs 6. And breaks the marriage covenant, destroying the souls of family members, marriage family and life. Jesus came to give us life more abundantly. The author of abuse in the home, is NOT Jesus. Jesus is love, not abuse. Satan is the father and the spirit behind domestic violence (iniquity); working and manifesting himself through the hearts of the wicked, wolves in sheep clothing, the prideful, and deeply hurting. Read Ephesians chapter 6, regarding warfare. Jesus came to destroy the works of the devil. Abuse is the carnal works of the flesh, for a Christian to be carnal minded, is for the professing Christian to be an enemy of God. Domestic violence is the works of iniquity, often generation to generation, until the curse is broken through the blood of Jesus. Jesus said Himself in Matthew 7:19-21, Many shall say, Lord , Lord, and He shall respond, depart from Me you worker of iniquity–I do not know you!–even though you did great works….etc. I do not know you. Jesus took upon abuse on the cross, so we can be free from family abuse, Jesus was deeply bruised on the cross for our deliverance from iniquity. By Jesus stripes we are healed. Isaiah Chapter 53. Domestic Violence is a plaque sweeping this nation, in these Noah like days. God is calling the church to repentance. Judgement from Father God shall begin in the church first. God heals the broken hearted and mends our wounds. Psalm 147:3. God will not NOT clear the guilty. Jesus is good, He said we would have trouble in this world, praise God He has gone back to heaven to prepare a place for us,, where there will be no more crying, pain, nor death. He has prepared a special mansion for each of us, who make Him Lord of our heart and life. Recieve Jesus as your personal Savior. Ask Him into your heart, and seek His face daily. Come to know Jesus as Your Jehovah Rophe, His name for your Divine Healer. God is Father God, Jesus the Son, and Holy Spirit (our Comforter). God is holy, abuse is unholy. Read the gospel of John in the New Testament. Worship Father God daily, and learn of Him. He is meek and lowly. He alone gives rest for the soul. My name is Jacqueline Stewart. I am an overcomer of attempted murder and rape, beaten, hand-cuffed behind my back and held hostage by a man I was once married. He (the perpretrator) shot at my head with a double barrow sawed off shot gun, The Lord in a twinkling of and eye, put in my heart to call upon the name of Jesus. I did, in less than a twinkling of an eye, the bullet richocheted, the oppsite direction and sparrowed through the wall. Leaving a bullet hole on one side of the wall and a burned out blast through the other side of the wall, about the size of one’s brain. It could have been my brain. Hallelujah, Jesus saved my life so I could declare His marvelous works. Jesus blood has cured my incurable soul, from so much to include dpression, self hate, low self esteem, lack of self worth, feelings that I am unworthy of love–these are charisteristics of a victim mind (syndrome). Jesus delivered me from many ilnness, he set me free from being overwhelmed with free and condemnation, He exchanged my sorrow for a spirit of joy and took away my ashes in excahnge for a spirit and worship unto Him, in spirit and in truth. He has done so much more… During my crisis (Romans 8:28 situation), the perpretrator threaten to cut up my body and throw the parts into the Sacramento river. Yet, Jesus said NOT so! God spared my life so I could declare His works. My crisis happened almost 17 years ago, thirty days after Nicole Simpson was murdered. The perpetrator said, he got the idea from her case. It’s no coinsident that Nicole and I were born the same month and year, I saw her her birth date on her tomb stone. My crisis (opportunity through crisis) was a Romans 8:28 situation, which says, “ALL things work together for the good of those who love God. Those called according to His purpose.” Amen. Thank you for taking time to read the above and hopefully hearing what the spirit of the Lord is saying, to bless you understanding and hatred for domestic violence. My web site regarding domestic violence, trauma, education and deep healing & deliverance is:
    May God bless you now and forever. May Jesus overwhelming matchless love enfold you now. With love in Christ Jesus, my Husband, Bishop of my soul, and Emmanuel, our God who never leaves us. In Jesus’ name amen!

  2. Thank you for sharing your story!

    — Danni

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