[Updated 3/19/2009]
Danni Moss is a pseudonym. I am using an alternate name for writing to give a measure of anonymity to my children, family and former in-laws. In my writing, my children are (in order of age) J, A and C. My ex-husband is Gary. This is not his real name. I do go by Danni in real life. I’m a 40-something single mom starting over after 20 years of marriage.
I’m also a professional writer and a vocalist. I spent most of my marriage as a stay-home mother but wrote for various organizations and purposes through the years. I used to act and direct drama as well, but have lost my interest in that avenue in the past few years. The intensity of my private life burned me out on drama.
I am especially passionate about the state of the Christian church and about abuse, by the church and within the church. I have an unfortunately extensive experience in this arena. This site is part of my personal goal of being actively involved in doing something about these issues.
I’d love to hear from you if you’re checking out my blog site. I do moderate all comments, and inflammatory or argumentative posts will be deleted. This is not an open forum for discussion, so I reserve the right to delete or edit as I see fit.
I look forward to “seeing” you on the site!
BECAUSE IT MATTERS ~ Freedom from Abuse in Christianity 
Ray,
If you see this and really want to talk about it, e-mail me using the link in the right side bar.
— Danni
Today I realised, it seems that the abused fight a losing battle. No matter how much how you try to explain to outsiders the severity or effects of abuse people just don’t understand. Sometimes I wish they could look inside us and see the carnage left behind in our souls and spirits by the emotional and verbal abuse. Theres no physical bruises just a crushed and cripple spirit. I hope this battle will eventuallybe understood by more
Hi you!
In explaining to people I am now going back to the Bible and science, because it seems anything else just doesn’t get through. It’s not just me and my feelings and my experience. The Bible says death and life are in the power of the tongue and science is proving this is true. Science knows that triggering the “fight or flight” mechanism of the sympathetic nervous system releases the hormone adrenalin to enable us to escape danger. That’s the way God made us. Science is now discovering that when that mechanism is triggered constantly, which is what happens with psychological abuse, it destroys a person’s immune system leading to a vast array of literal physical illnesses, many of them deadly – to say nothing of the shattered person that has been created long before this physical destruction is visible!
I have to keep believing it’s not an impossible battle. Those of us who know have to be the ones who keep standing up and crying out.
Keep holding on.
— Danni
Danni, I live in Texas. I know Texas has stricts laws on Clery abuse. I recently left a church in Fort worth, where the Pastor was verbally abusive to women. He is stalking me by contacting my current Pastor and spreading lies, there no proof to none of this, yet I feel victimized. I want to report him to a Government official. Where should I go? who do I contact that could stop this!
Since there is no official oversight of churches, if he does not break any laws, there is nothing anyone can do. But I would recommend that you write down everything he does, including dates, and record any corroborating evidence – and the names of people who can verify events and facts – that exists in case he ever does cross a line and commit a crime – such as stalking. I’d also recommend that you talk to the police department to find out what exactly constitutes stalking. He doesn’t have to follow you down the street to be stalking you. There are other means of stalking as well. If he is physically following you, point him out to the people you are with and make sure other people notice he is doing it so you’re not the only one who knows.
But it’s entirely possible there’s nothing at all you can do. Ps. 37 is excellent if that is the case. Eventually, it will pass. But it is not fun. It is hard when someone is going around to people in your life and lying about you and there is really nothing you can do to stop it. Unless you can concretely prove it – there’s nothing you can do.
— Danni